Swan Dive-(HED) P.E.

Bill Murray Banner
Originally uploaded by Mrs. H.

This is me...
on the edge...
and for some unforseen reason
I freak out on my very first day of real summer

Don't know why
Don't think I wanna find out

I could clean the dining room
I could help 17 pack his suitcase
I could lie in the sun
I could go for an ealry morning walk
I could be in Austin
I could be content
I could stop this mental madness spinning around inside my head
(No...I don't think I could)

I could roll up into a ball
grasp my head in my hands
and quiver

Who the hell am I?

I think I am driving myself crazy
...and when I look back and read this diary BLOG
I contemplate stopping this up and down ritual
...maybe
if I step away from this thing
and let my head clear up from the storm

I COULD dive down
deep down
into clear water...or i think i will make up a new word for Webster's Dictionary...Pseudocide-"Pretending to kill yourself"

SHIT


"I climb, hand over hand, closing my eyes
Too scared to look down
I climb, hand over hand
Putting distance between I and I and the ground

I get to the top
I stand on the edge
I look to the sky, and say all my prayers

[Chorus]
What could be better than a swan dive into the asphalt
I don't know, nothing can be better than a swan dive into the
asphalt

You should ask somebody, 'Cause I've got nothing to lose tonight
I misplaced my life tonight, chased all my friends away tonight
I don't say the right things
I don't look the right way
That's just not me
I listen to my music too loud, a watch too much damn TV

Tell me, who can control the flood?
No one
Where are the angels?
Nowhere
Where's the compassion?
Nowhere
Who knows the truth?
No one
Who will believe in me?
No one
Who will stand by me?
No one
Who will fly with me?
No one"
-PE